We practise but…. It does not work

We practice at home, looked at the video tutorials… but we are still unconfident on the dance floor … what should we do?

First of all: Don’t give up!! Everyone learns differently and it takes patience and practice until two people speak the same language of dancing, or until two people can dance harmoniously with each other. Also learning a flash mob needs a little patience until you feel comfortable with the steps, that is quite normal!

Here a few more things which could help or which you should ask yourself:

• Do you allow each other to lead or to be led? It is far from easy to give the right lading signs and as a woman to let go off the reins and be guided. Especially because in 8 out of 10 cases, the “follower” while dancing, in the relationship often takes the leading part. Giving up control while dancing is difficult. Most couples I have taught had to work on that, but where there is a will there’s a way 😉
  • A good way to practice this: the follower closes her/his eyes and tries to focus 100% on the partner’s guidance and body language. Make sure that her right, his left arm is not too tense, as well as not to squeeze the hand. Just hold the arms yourself and you get the basic tension you need for dancing, no cramping.
  • The Leading Part can also practice the steps themselves, with no partner, to focus fully on the steps and only then to take the lead in a next step. A person cannot focus on several things at the same time (even women – I know multitasking and so on… but this is very hard, I can tell). However, the more often you do the steps, it becomes a routine and that’s when the body can focus on something new.

• What expectations do you have of yourself? Perfectionists are finding it harder and harder to learn new things because they never fulfill their own aspirations from the beginning. It takes some time and practice again and it won’t be easy to lower your own expectations, but you have to – in the beginning. Try to lower the expectations of yourself and your partner and start with baby steps. Then you are allowed to raise the standards and slowly work your way to perfectionism. Which does not mean to learn wrong at the beginning! Just with a little more serenity and the thought that you do not have to be perfect from the very start. Take mistakes as an opportunity to laugh about them. Always get back into the dance and keep on trying until it works, practice makes perfect!

• How do you communicate with each other? Try not to blame yourself or argue, but to tell the partner what would make dancing easier, if the arm was less stiff, the hand is less tight, the steps are a bit smaller, etc. but not all at once!! And then only improve one thing at a time before you take the next step. That often helps a lot!

And if you have no idea why dancing doesn’t really work and you tried all the above… simply call, maybe we’ll find out in a short whatsApp-video call 😉